Local baozi made with cardboard and caustic soda. I’ve probably downed a couple of these…

Previously-

And here’s a Globe and Mail report on fake building materials used in the construction industry. Oy vey.

Fake plasma used in Chinese hospitals. Thanks, Alexis.

Antibiotics and antifungals found in imported fish. I’m feeling smug, now.

China promises to do better. Good luck with that.

The diethylene gylcol toothpaste shows up in the US. At the Dolla Store.

An interesting article on Chinese food safety. From the Southern Metropolis Daily, via Danwei.

Alexis mentioned in the comments that fugu was being sold as monkfish in the US.

China is executing the former head of it’s FDA and establishing a recall system.

While that friend and defender of the little guy, the Bush administration, takes China to task for food safety, Mom and Lina have been on the case, and dug up these new examples of delicious adulteration.

Toothpaste made with diethylene glycol as a thickener. Best known as windshield washer fluid, the chemical is also popular in the manufacture of wholly counterfeit medicines as well.

Contaminated traditional Chinese medicines. (Ironically, besides arsenic, cadmium, lead, strychnine and mercury, some patent medicines are being adulterated with pharmaceuticals like acetaminophen or cortisone.)

Melamine added to pet and livestock feed, as well as protein flours for human consumption, to increase its apparent protein content. The New York Times just published an expose on the subject. As an ex-carpenter, I should have recognized the adulterant. Mom pointed me to the FDA alert. Thanks, Mom.

The article mentioned some new and exciting contamination- eels battened on birth-control pills, and cuttlefish dipped in (calligraphy) ink. Looking deeper, I found this article on the People’s Daily website, which mentions fish dipped in formaldehyde and bamboo shoots treated with industrial sulfur.

I’m especially interested in the birth-control eels, if anyone can point me to some solid information on it.

Carcinogenic wax added to hotpot and to pepper oil. A lot of contamination has to do with Sudan 1. Chinese people like their food to be really red.

Human hair made into soy sauce.

Synthetic eggs (in shell).

Carcinogenic red dye in duck eggs.

“Sewer Grease” in lard.

Fake infant formula, causing a condition known as “Big Head Disease”.

Bleached Rice contaminated with aflotoxin.

In an ironic twist, it seems that Chinese farmers are being swindled with counterfeit pesticide. (I have to say that we get very nice vegetables and fruit here in Beijing, probably on account of all those banned pesticides.)

In any event, I went in for two more DVD shoots. The first I did with Ellen, in the incredibly cool Automation Lab at Xinghua University. It was essentially a long hallway, with glass-fronted classrooms on either side. In the classrooms were a variety of robot playgrounds. I kicked myself for not getting pictures.

Suffice it to say, when not choking on my lines, I spent my time peering at the various machines. One room was just bank after bank of mainframe computers. Another room held a small soccer field, scattered with little humanoid robots, like players relaxing on the field after a match. Then there was the Barbie-scale carwash, and the robot-hand display, and several labs full of cool-looking prototyping gear.

The script itself included a Presidential debate between Senator Butler (my favorite, if you’ll recall) and Congressman Santos. A tough job made tougher by the fact that the Senator was an Armenian guy with a thick accent.

For some reason, all my roles that day were either teachers or “coordinators”, so I brought my tie collection.

Since I’m leaving Beijing in about a week and a half, I planned to forgo any new work for these guys, but I was guilted into one final shoot by the new production coordinator. (You know that scene you shot with Bald Guy? It’s not finished! We’ll have to throw out the whole thing!)

Yoyo has unfortunately quit the company, to pursue a lucrative career in tourguiding. I struggled with my lines, as usual. The one skit I nailed drew on my construction background. I played the role of Arnie.
_________________

Place: In a workshop 在车间两男
Role: Employee and manager
Content: The employee doesn’t wear a hard hat, a conversation about safety between the manager and the employee by using modals could and might.

Manager: Arnie, why aren’t you wearing a hard hat?
Arnie: Oh, I don’t need one.
Manager: If you don’t wear a hat, you might get hurt.
Arnie: I don’t think so. I’ll be careful. Besides, it’s too hot in here to wear a hat.
Manager: I know but we have occupational health and safety rules we have to follow. You’ve been briefed on them before, haven’t you?
Arnie: Yes, I have. But..
Manager: No buts, Arnie. The last thing I want is for you to hurt yourself and have you end up in hospital.
Arnie: You’re right. If I get hurt, I might miss work. I could lose a lot of money if I can’t work. My wife and family depend on me. I can’t do this to them.
Manager: Exactly. And you’re one of my best employees. I can’t afford to lose you either. Here, let me get you a hard hat.
Arnie: Thanks.
_________________

My personal experience in construction leads me to suspect this is how it would go down in the US-

Place: In a workshop 在车间两男
Role: Employee and manager
Content: The employee doesn’t wear a hard hat, a conversation about safety between the manager and the employee by using expletives and threats.

Manager: Arnie, why aren’t you wearing a hard hat?
Arnie: Fuck you.
Manager: If you don’t wear a hat, you might get hurt.
Arnie: I don’t care.
Manager: I know but we have occupational health and safety rules we have to appear to follow.
Arnie: But I’m drunk.
Manager: No buts, Arnie. The last thing I want is for you to hurt yourself and have to pay worker’s comp.
Arnie: You’re right. If I get hurt, I might miss work. I could lose a lot of money if I can’t work. My dog and my meth dealer depend on me. I can’t do this to them.
Manager: Exactly. And you’re one of my best employees. I can’t afford to lose you either. Wear the hat or you’re fired.
Arnie: Thanks.
_________________

Chinese version-

Place: In a workshop 在车间两男
Role: migrant laborer and manager
Content: The employee wears a hard hat, a conversation about guanxi between the manager and the employee by using callous disregard for life.

Manager: Ah Q, why are you wearing a hard hat?
Ah Q: I need one. They’re required by law.
Manager: If you wear a hat, someone might think it’s dangerous around here.
Ah Q: It is dangerous. I’m being careful. Besides, my cousin was decapitated yesterday by this machine I’m using right here.
Manager: I know, but we have occupational health and safety inspectors visiting today. You’ve been briefed on causing us to lose face, haven’t you?
Ah Q: Yes, I have. But…
Manager: No buts, Q. The last thing I want is to be embarrassed, or have to pay a bigger bribe.
Ah Q: You’re right. If I get hurt, I might die. My family could lose a lot of money if I die. My wives in Sichuan and Beijing depend on me. I can’t do this to them.
Manager: Exactly. And you’re only one of many expendable slaves. I can easily afford to lose you. In fact, you’re fired. You’ll be beaten on the way out…
Ah Q: Thanks.

Corn

Scallions

Bicycle Tires

Pick Axes

Cabbages

Air Conditioners (Unplugged)

Roof Tiles

Stuffed Animals

No Frisbees